Time For Gaming

In life, it always seems like there is never enough time to do everything we want. How we decide to spend our time results in that time not being spent on other possible activities. How does one find time for everything? How can we find the right balance between work and play?

I need more time to play games. The constant pressure to make the most efficient use of time, stay productive, yet still find time to relax, can be stressful in itself. Today, if a game requires more than 8-10 hours to complete, I often find it difficult to motivate myself to even get started. This is why I love Indie games, for though they are short, I can easily complete games like Journey, Pyre, Shovel Knight, and Ori and the Blind Forest in a few days' time and still be able to fully enjoy and appreciate them. Of course, I haven't completely abandoned games that might require 20-30 hours, or even 80-100 hour RPG behemoths, but my limited time necessitates that I play such games far less frequently than before. I'm a different type of gamer now. Maturation changes a person. So does adulthood.

This time last year, I had significantly more free time on my hands. Having just finished graduate school and working a much lighter teaching schedule, I sunk 80 hours into playing Final Fantasy XV and obtaining its platinum trophy on the PS4. This game took ten years to complete, and when it was finally released, it still wasn't finished. Where did all that time go? Better games (and just as good-looking) have been made in far less time. I waited a year post-release before I finally began playing through FFXV. Though I enjoyed it for the most part, this game has too many flaws to include "Final Fantasy" as part of its title. The story was terribly uninspired and unsophisticated (it felt like a complete waste of time), and it failed to capitalize on the genuinely interesting main characters and villain. I spent a lot of time playing FFXV, only to realize that the missing DLC chapters meant that there were gaps in the main plot. The collector's edition I purchased didn't even include the season pass. Recently, Square Enix announced that they would cancel much of the originally planned additional content.

So many years to make a game, so many hours to play through it. And yet, the game is still incomplete. Although I also bought the Royal Edition during Black Friday that includes the DLC content, I don't care enough about FFXV to return to it anytime soon.

Whenever I choose games to play, I need to consider how much time they would require to finish. It isn't enough for me to simply play a game for a few hours; I have to see it all the way through to the end before I feel comfortable moving on the the next game. I also usually like to dabble in post-game content, and if I like the game enough, I may go as far as to attain 100% completion. But because I have such an immense backlog of games I wish to play though, I need to strategically plan out which games I will set aside time to play. There have been numerous instances in which I would plan to play through certain titles before the year's end, only to put them off for the next year (and sometimes the year after that). And then of course, there are times when I change my mind about the games I want to play. Though I originally planned on finishing Bioshock and NieR: Automata this month, I ended up playing through a bunch of Castlevania games, the Gameboy Mega Man titles, Warioware Gold, and Mario Kart 7. I've also been playing through games on my NES Classic like Bubble Bobble, Gradius, and Ghosts 'n Goblins (don't play Ghosts 'n Goblins on the NES).

Last year, I finally managed to play through Resident Evil and Resident Evil 4, Half Life 1 and 2, and Mass Effect 1 and 2, Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance, and Mother 3, after years of telling myself that I absolutely must complete these games. Part of me still feels ashamed for putting these timeless classics off for so long. Right now, I really want to play the Resident Evil 2 remake, but Kingdom Hearts III is also coming out next week, and that game will probably take up most of my gaming time throughout February. At the same time, I still need to play Mass Effect 3 to finish the trilogy, and maybe Half Life 3 will finally be confirmed before I can go through all the other games on my bucket list.

I am a devout fan of several series, having played through every, or almost every, main title included in them. This month, I've been blazing through the remaining Castlevania games that I never got around to. Having played through every Kingdom Hearts title (and being one of the few who can actually follow the story), I'm ready to go for KH III. My long-term relationship with Final Fantasy was the only reason I was willing to play through FFXV.

But there are still so many other titles I need to get around to, and not enough time to do so anytime soon. The sheer time commitment required for games like Witcher 3 and Skyrim is the main reason I still haven't played them. Dark Souls is another series I have yet to fully immerse myself in, and though I played the first game for a couple hours, I only got a small taste of what the Dark Souls games have to offer. Hours and hours of masochism, as I'm fully aware. Again, I need to find ways to set aside time for all these games.

Then we have those amazing releases from 2017 (Resident Evil VII, NieR: Automata, Nioh, Horizon Zero Dawn, Assassin's Creed Origins, Cuphead...) and 2018 (Monster Hunter World, Red Dead Redemption 2, Celeste, Dragon Ball Fighter Z, Assassin's Creed Odyssey, Spider-Man...), and all the other games I bought during Black Friday for the last two years that I have yet to play. Furthermore, although I consider myself a fan of Fire Emblem and have played through all the GBA and 3DS games, there are still like five games in that franchise that I haven't played. How do I find time for all of these games?

When I was a young gamer, I felt content repeatedly replaying the same games I owned. Of course, such would be the case when one's parents is only willing to spend $40-60 buying a video game for their children only a few times a year. But now that I can buy my own games, and now that I have committed to my quest to finish as many games on my bucket list as possible, I rarely play through a game more than once. Once I complete a game, I will likely not come back to it anytime soon. I wish I could go back in time and spend more time playing other games rather than replaying the same games constantly, then perhaps my bucket list wouldn't be so long. Did I really have to play through Pokemon dozens of time, doing the same old shit over and over? The 493 hours I put into my Diamond save file... I could have used that time for other games. Then again, I didn't have money, and we always make the most of what we have.

And I don't even have kids yet. As much as I want them, I know that if/when I have kids, the time I will have for games will dissipate even more. When I read stories about gaming parents and how having kids makes it nearly impossible to find time for playing video games, I can't help but wonder whether I will ever truly have enough time, time to play games and do everything else I want and need to do, before I die.

I truly believe I could have made much better use of my time during my childhood and adolescence. Though I suppose that's everyone. I could have read more books and spent more time practicing martial arts. All the hours I put into certain games, I could have put into others. But then again, no one is perfect, and it's impossible to truly make the "best" use of time no matter how hard we try. As Gandalf says in Fellowship of the Ring, "all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given." We make these decisions while knowing that there's always tomorrow, and stressing too much over making every hour, minute, or second count could simply result in us spending too much time worrying or failing to truly enjoy the little free time we have.

I'm a few games away from completing my 500th game (currently at 495 games beat). My bucket list includes almost 300 other titles, and there will surely be more in the future. I just need to spend far less time scrutinizing my bucket list and stressing about not having enough time to play everything. Maybe I'm already playing too many video games. Of course, I don't always have to play games; there are other activities I enjoy, like writing, reading, exercising, and watching movies/television shows. I shouldn't worry incessantly about how much time I think I'm wasting or about not having sufficient time to play all the games I want. I should just enjoy the time I have and feel happy that I still have so much more to look forward to.